Friday, 28 February 2014

Daddy improving

Today is Mr M's birthday - Happy Birthday Gorgeous!!

You may remember me writing a post a few weeks back about men and the effect that pregnancy and new baby can have on them and that they are often forgotten.

Mr M is improving from how he was feeling a month ago.  It was tough for a while but he is now seeing his GP regularly and has been put forward for support from services.

I have tried to offer as much support as I can.  I have had a number of hats on throughout - my concerned wife hat, my mental health nurse hat and a very occasional time my grumpy tired mummy hat.

Some people have found it difficult to understand how a dad is struggling with a new baby, a few times people have said "he was so excited about becoming a dad".  What do they think happens with mums who suffer from post-natal depression?! Were they also not looking forward to becoming a parent!? Of course they were!!

It's not just the new baby that has caused Mr M to feel unwell - he's had a tough year or so.  He was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, his grandad (who he adored) passed away quite quickly.  He has always been quite an anxious person but this has been amplified.

Through his hardest period every time Baby M cried he was worried that our neighbours would phone social services.  It was difficult to convince him that babies cry and also they have children they will understand.

We have been sitting down and talking a lot.  We work together the challenge his thinking and anxieties.  He is doing really well and I keep telling him that small steps are important, even though he might not feel hes making any progress he is.

I am so proud of how well he is doing and he is such an amazing dad to Baby M.  I hope he has a wonderful birthday just as he deserves!!